they mostly come out at night... mostly

Check out MostlyLisa.com

2007-10-25T01:54:00.001-07:00

Mostly Lisa Rides the Deadliest Rollercoaster in the UK

2007-10-25T00:38:00.000-07:00

"Winning isn't Everything"

2007-10-08T19:45:00.000-07:00

Mostly Lisa's Seaplane Adventures

2007-10-02T19:56:00.001-07:00

Mostly Lisa's Personal Assistant

2007-09-23T17:42:00.000-07:00

Mostly Lisa Back in Vancouver

2007-09-23T17:40:00.000-07:00

Mosty Lisa in England Episode 4 - Riding with Postman Pat

2007-09-11T20:44:00.000-07:00

Mosty Lisa in England Episode 3 - Marmite crisps

2007-09-11T20:43:00.000-07:00

Mosty Lisa in England Episode 2 - Watt's up?

2007-09-11T20:42:00.000-07:00

Mostly Lisa in England, Episode 1: Being Popular

2007-09-11T20:41:00.001-07:00

Mostly Lisa Presents - A Model Moment

2007-08-30T18:35:00.001-07:00

Arcade Adventures with Mostly Lisa

2007-08-29T00:40:00.000-07:00

Dinner with Lisa ...mostly

2007-08-06T22:50:00.000-07:00

Boating with Lisa ... mostly

2007-08-02T13:09:00.001-07:00

Yorkie is Not for Girls.

2007-07-26T13:57:00.001-07:00

Fancy a Crisp?

2007-07-26T03:55:00.001-07:00

15 seconds with Lisa at a modeling audition

2007-07-18T00:11:00.000-07:00

15 seconds with Lisa in Kitsilano, Vancouver

2007-07-14T04:02:00.001-07:00

I am NOT a Muggle - Episode 1: The Portkey

2007-07-12T13:14:00.000-07:00

NOT a Muggle!

H. Potter ref (Goblet of Fire)

15 seconds with Lisa Rollerblading

2007-07-07T18:01:00.000-07:00

more than meets the eye!

2007-07-06T12:17:00.000-07:00

Pictured Transformers are my very own sweet collection of Generation 1 (1984) Mini-bots:
Cosmos (Autobot), Seaspray (Autobot), Windcharger (Autobot), Laserbeak* (Decepticon)

*Laserbeak is technically not a Mini-bot, he's a cassette minion of Soundwave. If you wanna get technical...

15 seconds with Lisa in Varadero, Cuba.

2007-06-30T15:25:00.001-07:00

15 seconds with Lisa in Disneyland

2007-06-28T20:36:00.001-07:00

Spend 15 seconds with Lisa in Cancun

2007-06-28T20:22:00.000-07:00

Hi Blogger... it's been a while...

2007-06-28T19:27:00.000-07:00

So i've been meaning to delete from my web presence a long time ago, but people keep coming here! i can't seem to stop them. but they do seem to find my new blog:
lisabettany.wordpress.com.

And plus, you are my first blog... the blog i started when i didn't have a gosh-darned clue about html or css or even flickr. crazy! so i will make you look pretty again, since i actually know how to do that now... actually blogger, you are looking quite snazzy... almost too snazzy! you're kinda making my wordpress blog look bad!

Oooh cheeky, aren't you? these embedded flash vids look so sharp and nice and since free wordpress accounts disable flash and javascrip, i'm kinda feeling a little bit drawn to your javascript friendliness Blogger...

i know, i know... just upgrade your wordpress and the plug-in gods will smile on you. i'm on it! jeez. but seriously, it does take some time and some know how... like what's a PHP or a MYSQL... i dunno, but i HAVE to know... which is kinda the problem.

so for now, blogger, i will post a tidbit here and there and say hello every now and then. or all y'al visiting peeps can wander around and visit my old posts and pictures... from a different time... a time that was 6 months ago. that's a long time on the www.

until then, take care blogger. and if y'all want to visit me in the present you can go to:
Lisa's wordpress blog
Lisa on Virb
Lisa's Videos on Tumblr

Clicky????

Please go to my NEW Blog

2007-02-21T23:18:00.000-08:00

Just in case you missed it:
Tengo un Blog nuevo
en wordpress. Quisiera que usted viniera visitarme.

Я имею новое BLOG на wordpress.

Έχω ένα νέο Blog στα wordpress. Θα σας επιθυμούσα για να έρθω και να με επισκεφτώ.

Gekommen zu meinem neuen Blog.

novo Blog.

Question:

How come I get more hits now that I've moved to a NEW Blog than when I was here everyday updating like a mad blogspot blog blogger? It's perplexing. Because my NEW Blog is far superior. True, it's a little more professional. It's a bit different. But I have faith in you and I know that you will follow the many links provided here and that after some getting use to you will find that you too like my NEW Blog better.

I haven't abandoned you. I'm OVER HERE.

Lovely. Lisa's NEW Blog

Missing BannerMania?

2007-02-19T15:14:00.000-08:00

For all the people who are missing the crazy collage montage banner that used to grace the top of my page -- it's your lucky day. I have added my lovely collage to the footer, so you can visit it whenever, or however often you like. And it's clickable!

Click on BannerMania and you will be magically sent to my new wordpress blog.

Lisa's New Blog on Wordpress

2007-02-18T15:25:00.000-08:00

After a colossal disagreement over untweakability and general crappiness of its template html code, Blogger and I have decided that it's best that we go our separate ways. Don't feel bad. The relationship was tenuous at best and I admit to have been checking out other blog hosts for quite some time now. I know. It's horrible. But it's really for the best for both of us.

I'm happy to announce,"they mostly come out at night... mostly" has found better home and more stable relationship with WordPress.

My new blog: http://lisabettany.wordpress.com

Goodbye Blogger. We'll always be friends.

Guitar Chords of the Week

2007-02-17T15:02:00.000-08:00

I don't have time to be a fancy pants with my normal level of chord charting, so I will just link you up to the song I am playing at this very moment: "You've Got to Hide Your Love Away" by the Beatles. It's a fun song to play with nice simple chords so you don't have to hurt yourself with any crazy finger stretching ones like those in the "B" family...

"B" is for Bar chord and Big Blisters.

Sophie's on 4th: A Very Kitsy Place

2007-02-16T01:28:00.000-08:00

Sophie's Cosmic Cafe, located on the corner of 4th and Arbutus in lovely Kitsilano, is a fun place to have dinner. The best part is that fun never stops because Sophie's is right next to the Comic Shop (bright yellow building) and the Candy Aisle (groovy green building). Eat, nerd, and rot your teeth, all in one go.

Here's a nice, cozy booth for you and me. I think I'll order the Sophie's Nut Burger with fries and a Caesar salad. Oh, and a big chocolate milkshake for desert. How 'bout you? The open-faced turkey sandwich with fries and lots of gravy? Sounds great. Oh yes I know, gravy really is everywhere.

Yes, that's a giant plastic fish stuck on a pool table... I know, it adds a certain degree of je ne sais quoi?

There are loads of entertaining things to look at in the Cosmic Cafe. They have the largest, mish mashed collection of 50s, 60s and 70s memorabilia I've ever seen... crazy glued to a restaurant wall.

You have a soft spot for Oldies' tunes as well? Why, what a lovely coincidence. My personal favourite Old School ditty is by the great Jimmy Dean, "Smoke, Smoke, Smoke that Cigarette." Yours too? Brilliant.

You know what goes great with cigarettes? Coffee. And lots of it. I'm on my fifth cup.

Hey! It's Charles. He's a very proud parrot.

Thanks for visiting Sophie's! Hope your experience was cosmic. I sure had fun.

BannerMania

2007-02-15T21:01:00.000-08:00

What happens when you watch, study, and obsess over Wes Anderson films for three days in a row? BannerMania 2007. Intervention time? I think so.

ValenTimes with Mindy

2007-02-14T11:42:00.000-08:00

Today is the Valentine's Day -- the National Day of Love. And who better to talk about love and nations, then our favourite guest blogger, love guru, and my best friend, Mindy. To discuss the intricacies of love and relationships, I present Mindy.

Hi Guys and Girlies,

I'm so happy to be here again sharing my live and and love on my bff Lisa's blog. I don't always understand your posts (were those real ants, cuz that's kinda gross to put your hand in an ant farm), but you know that I love you no mater what, my lovely Lola!! Hahaha.

Anyways, I was totally going to write a big long writing about how important it is to love and how, even if you love someone and they don't love you AS much, and it feels like your stalking him and he says you ARE stalking him, and you say "when are we getting married?" and he says "get lost I don't even know your name" and you say "but I love you" and then he deletes your friendship from facebook which is so cold, and... oh, what was I saying? Oh yeah, how it's important to love people (even if they don't love you back). So in the name of my favourite day of the year, Valentimes Day, I'm going to put my heart out there and let you read my most private and personal thoughts live from my diary (click on the picture to make it bigger).

Feliz día de San Valentín.

2007-02-14T00:07:00.000-08:00

Y un otro regalo para mis audiencias de habla español (sobre todo mi profesor español preferido) que no entenderán Mindy porque ella es tan tonta. Aquí está mi mejor tentativa en escribir un poema español (con ayuda del diccionario). Feliz día de San Valentín.

los besos del fuego
empapan la noche.
La oscuridad baja entre los momentos y las fantasías.
Funciono mis dedos a través de las vides de uvas heladas,
cubiertas en demasiada noche
y demasiados sueños.
Bebemos el vino barato.
Está nublado y prueba como corcho.
Pero bailamos hasta mañana.
Me siento feliz.

Where am I?

2007-02-12T19:38:00.000-08:00

Here's a super fun blog game to cheer up this soggy Monday evening. Where is Lisa and what is she doing? It sure looks fun.

Another thing that's fun is watching my favourite performances from the 2007 Grammy Awards:
1. JT is on FIRE. Seriously, he plays the guitar and the piano too?! Check out his band. They are ridiculous in a very good way. It would be my fantasy to just linger amongst all that gear. Just for good measure, here's another JT vid with more "band moments" JT Live in Paris.

2. Singer/songwriters bring the music back. Check out: Corinne Bailey Rae, John Legend and John Mayer.

3. Finally, payback is so sweet for the Dixie Chicks who didn't make nice and got 5 Grammies.

Enjoy!

Dance, dance

2007-02-11T16:12:00.000-08:00

The moment before with Canadian Couple, Anton Belyayev & Karolina Paliwoda (pictured below).

A dandy time with Florian Gschaider & Manuela Stoecki.

Quicksteppin' it with International Open Standard Champions, Benedetto Ferrugia & Claudia Koehler.

Snowball Classic 2007

2007-02-11T02:30:00.000-08:00

I just returned from the Sheraton Wall Centre Ballroom where this year's International Ballroom competition, the Snowball Classic was held. The dancers were truly breathtaking and I had a fabulous time watching the event from the front seats. Amazing! I snapped some shots while I was there. Here are a few before I crash into bed. Long night. I will put up the rest tomorrow.

Meet Mookie the Bear

2007-02-10T01:52:00.000-08:00

Meet my furry friend Mookie the Bear. He really is a fine fellow. Here are some things Mookie likes:

1. A good bocce ball game.

2. Boating.

Wait! Don't forget your life vest. Safety first, Mookie.

How are you going to drive that Mookie? Crazy Bear.

3. Playing Hide and Seek. Mookie is very good at hiding. See if you can find him in the following pictures. You might have to put on your sleuthing hat and spectacles to crack this case.

Through the looking glass

2007-02-08T21:34:00.000-08:00

Today was my first photoshoot on the other side of the lens. And let me tell you, the artistic responsibility of the "Photographer" is quite a bit different than the "Model". How much? Exponentially. I really did have an ignorant misconception of how much is involved in creating an image from the grassroots up. Here are some things that I didn't know before:

1. Gear. There is a lot of gear. And they actually expect you to lug it all around (to where they are). They also expect you to set it up and know how it works. Honestly, do you think that I've ever carried anything, anywhere with these Palmolive hands (this is an exaggeration as I have in fact carried some fruit-type items from Safeway to the car at least three times... Uh.. make that twice). There are lenses, flashes, lights, umbrellas, filters, gels, bounces... Balance for the fluorescents, too much tungsten, we need the blue gels, two lights, three lights, up a stop, down a stop, what's a stop? Stop. Where's the scrim? It's exhausting.

2. No pampering. Where's my chamomile tea? Uh, I have to get it myself? What? There is no tea. None. Go buy some?! What?

3. Direction. As the photographer you have to give directions to... people. Chin down, face the light, rotate this way... I know, horrific.

Until today, I have avoided shooting "people" like nothing else. You see, I am a quiet soul who likes to shoot nice stills of inanimate things. I can go out and happily shoot a fallen leaf, a lonely old sofa, a scrap, a screw, a broken nut or any number of lost and found items living in the crooks and crannies of the world. Alley ways are good. Empty corridors are wonderful. Really, any area small or large where there are no moving people-type things is perfect. You see, people just mess up my artistic vision. They're always in front of the great building, or camped out on the picturesque beach at sunset, or blocking the perfect light on my derelique little scene. Poking their noses where they don't belong. Poke.

This attitude of mine seems to be problematic when trying to make money from photographing people. Money. Oh yes. Yes. Right. That old sofa did not pay a dime for it's stunning portrait. What a cheapskate! Come to think about it, neither did that fallen leaf. How 'bout that.

I love people. Gather here all people and I will take your picture. It will be lovely and you will pay me and I will buy food. Great.

4. Gear. You have to put it away too.

In honour of my transition from one side of the lens to the other, I share with you some outtakes from my 'brief', yet 'intense' "career" as a "model" (note the use of single and double "quotation" marks.) Straight from the contact sheet to you. Voila.

Can't you just feel the fan blowing in your hair? Please don't make fun of the shiny pants. It was during Y2K. We were all a little shiny then, remember?

Isle of Man and Postman Pat

2007-02-07T20:47:00.000-08:00

When I was little, my mum and I would travel across the Atlantic to visit my grandparents in the Isle of Man.

The windswept island, located in the middle of the Irish Sea, is home to the Manx cat, TT racing, and a warm population of people seeking tax shelter and good fortune from the many pixie fairies that live on the island. Superstitious lot. Here's a fairy* good link if you would like to learn more about Isle of Man Fairies including, fairy activities, fairy dwelling-places, and human/fairy interactions.

I loved my summers on the Isle of Manx. For a little girl from the Prairies who dreamt of being a marine biologist or a script girl for team Zissou, the beach was wonderland of fun. I spent most of my time scooping up various marine life with my spade and shrimp net and plopping them into beautifully constructed sand bucket habitats. Sustainability of my new saltwater friends in said habitats did not necessarily enter into my mind at the time. Result: Marine life was not sustained in castle-shaped sand bucket. The little fishes and the scuttling crabs and the beady-eyed shrimp all died. Died. I just don't understand. I put plenty of seaweed for them to eat. That's what they eat, right?

So... the next year I took to flying kites and puppetry.

After building the marine habitats, and flying kites, and performing "Jack and the Bean Stalk" with my intricately glued construction paper finger puppets, I watched my favourite show "Postman Pat" (and his black and white cat). I was recently able to revisit the lovable stop-animation teleshow through a new interactive flash site for Postman Pat. Wonderful! You can even watch clips from the show. Oh, it made me so happy to visit Greendale again.

*$.99 Pun Whiz, Special Order, 1989.

Look Up

2007-02-07T02:11:00.000-08:00

Where in the world am I?

2007-02-06T16:57:00.000-08:00

Here's a super fun game I call: Where in the world is Lisa? It sure seems fun, doesn't it?

Object of game: Identify the location of the above picture.
Hint 1#: North America would be a good place to start your map quest.

Exposed: Germfest 2007

2007-02-05T17:26:00.000-08:00

72 hours ago I was not sick. Now I am. This week on "Exposed" we explore possible reasons why I am currently sick. This is hard hitting news people. Be prepared.

Before we begin, let's take a look some possible infection sites that I have encountered in the last 72 hours.

1. The internet.
2. "24" on DVD.
3. My refrigerator.
4. Things that have collected underneath my couch including: 2 black pens, 1 white sport sock, 3 paper clips, and a post-it listing the following items: bread, lettuce, tomatoes and bacon. That sounds like a good old fashioned BLT, if you ask me.
5. The doctor's office.

Now, let's look at the facts:
1. You can't get viruses from the internet with a Mac.
2. Jack Bauer stopped the virus threat before it spread across the Canadian border.
3. There is nothing in my refrigerator except packages of ketchup and those puppies are AIR locked.
4. It's implausible that a list of BLT ingredients could spread a nasty cold virus.
5. but a doctor's office... A ha!

Here's where the "A-ha!" came from:
Sick people go to the doctor because they're sick. They bring their sick bodies into the doctor's office and cough and puke and wipe their sticky, drippy noses all over the chairs, examining tables, and door knobs. Germs. Everywhere.

I'm pretty sure that the sick people don't wipe up their sick messes, and the doctors sure don't have time to disinfect between patients, and I'm dead certain that the office helper lady with the frazzled peroxide hair and 4 inch lee press-ons isn't getting off her sweet ass to do anything about the big rave cave of fun that is Germfest 2007.

And so I ask the hard hitting question that is on all of our minds: "What about the germs?" Exactly, what about the germs. I think the proof is in the pudding.

A recipe for proof pudding:
72 hours ago I went to the doctor for a routine check up. I wasn't sick, but everyone in the waiting room was sick. Sick. Yes, sick with germs. Go on now, hammer it home: The doctor's office made me sick (pictured below).

Awareness:
The doctor's office is a germ party. An all-inclusive airborne party that likes to spread fun times to everyone. But I'm on to you germs! You and your friends better find another place to party.

And the winner is...

2007-02-04T17:14:00.000-08:00

Meet Snasserson

2007-02-04T14:42:00.001-08:00

He's a friendly fellow who likes to dance in his red shoes.

Remembering Oak Bay High

2007-02-02T18:46:00.000-08:00

Look. There I am in high school. A bit needy of attention, aren't we? Good thing I got over that! Phew.

Let's revisit the ol' green and white, shall we?
Pictures circa 2005, post new paint job. I do miss the old pink and blue, East and West buildings -- they kind of reminded me of a pair mismatched socks. Cute.

My entrance of choice. Cool kids only. That is until my tag and locker got moved to the west. Worst tag ever: Marcelass.

Most of my Grade 12 year was spent on this track in Bultlermania. I initially signed up for the 4x100 relay (shortest distance, least pressure), but got roped into running cross-country (much much longer than 100m) and the 400m (oh boy did you ever feel those last 300m. Hitting the wall, indeed.)

Part of my Grade 9 year was also spent on this track. But instead of running, I was marching, yes marching around the track in BandNerdmania. Preparation for the Oak Bay Tea Party and the Victoria Day Parade required many lunch hours of concentrated marching while playing. Step lightly. And I did. The fat kid with the Tuba, not so much. We rocked those parades playing the theme songs from "The Muppet Show" and "Indiana Jones" and my flute trills were spectacular.

The upside: Playing Indiana Jones theme in Disneyland, then going on the new Indiana Jones ride. Special.

The down sides:
- Public ridicule
- Wearing 100 year-old heavy, wool jackets, shoes made of plastic, and see-through white polyester pants (I always forgot to hem mine, so at the last minute I would tape the pant bottom to my leg. Smart move. Maybe not)
- Witnessing Disney theme park characters without their heads on. Up until this point, I was pretty sure they were real.

I ate my lunches here under the willow trees. Alone. Out of choice. I felt more connected to the earth that way.

Leaving memory lane. Come back soon.

NB. This post has nothing to do with recently signing up for Facebook. Nothing at all. Loser.

Greetings from VGH

2007-02-01T17:28:00.000-08:00

Photos taken inside and outside the Vancouver General Hospital. It is amazing what you can find just around the corner.

font color of my life = #nnerdd

2007-01-31T22:08:00.000-08:00

You know url a nerd when:

1. You make a joke integrating obscure html code;
2. You are currently tweaking your widgets using tips from hackosphere;
3. Listing the hexidecimal value for more than 10 specific colours including: azure, moccasin, and slate gray is easy peazy;
4. Someone catches you listening to Peter Jackson's commentary on King Kong, while doing numbers 1, 2 and 3.

My Hat Collection (part two)

2007-01-31T00:15:00.000-08:00

Winter is a good time to wear hats in Canada. Especially out here on the West Coast where it is really cold in January. Why, just today it was a brisk 7°C. I almost froze to death. Plus, it was really sunny and just looking at the picturesque mountains, trees, beaches, and ocean made me depressed. I'm never going out again. Okay, maybe a few times, but only to display my hat collection.

Shh... don't tell anyone. It's a secret (see Albert Markovski (huckabees) quote below).

"Have you ever transcended space and time?
Yes. No. Uh, TIME, not space... No, I don't know what you're talking about."

My Hat Collection (part one)

2007-01-30T00:48:00.000-08:00

Hats are fun. Hats are a celebration of expression.

This is the exact moment I started expressing my emotions through hats. This hat choice says, "Yeah, Christmas!", "I'm having so much fun with all my new presents", "I ate my food".

Fast forward a few more years. With this holly jolly fuzzy hat choice, I am expressing the same celebratory excitement for Christmas. (Aside: It is almost February and I have not taken down my Christmas tree. It has become part of the livingroom now. I love it. Don't make me put away the skating mouse. He's so happy where he is.)

Through my exploration of hats, I have encountered the rare "stubborn hat". A hat so unbreakable that it literally has it's own independent personality from the wearer. These hats say, "Step off. I am a my own hat, and if you wear me I will reluctantly sit on top of your head and completely disregard your emotional intent. These hats are no fun.
The first "stubborn hat" I encountered was a large black Stetson hat, that I HAD to wear during a photo shoot. Half way through the shoot I felt like this "stubborn hat" was not giving me anything to work with. I stopped and said to it, as tough as nails, "damn you hat, I'm taking over now. If you won't let me celebrate you, then you're gonna celebrate me!" This is the product after the showdown. I still think the hat is wearing me. Erg.

The graduation hat is also a tricky hat. Overwhelming in it's own right, but also quite distracting to wear with all the tassel business hanging in front of your face. This hat even comes with added responsibility of learning the tassel instructions. Is "graduated" on the right or left side?... Ah I could never remember.

After the completion of my Master's degree, I went from my "serious and tedious academic phase" to a "complete return to childhood" phase. Which was all about the colour pink, no responsibility and Disneyland. In the following pictures of me and my very pink hats, you get a glimpse at my celebration of all things Disney. I am saying, "I'm in the happiest place on earth", More, more sugar...", "Wee....Mister Toad's Wild Ride, Peter Pan, Splash... oooh ahhh", " then I am singing, "No one to tell us no, or where to go, or say we're only dreaming... a whole new world.." and then I get my fortune by my favourite Disney Main street girl "Esmeralda".

To be continued...
This exploratory montage of my hat collection will resume tomorrow with part two -- you never know what kind of zaniness will ensue.

I dedicate this post to Billy's curious fascination with my hat collection et al.

Fancy P-Ants

2007-01-29T00:35:00.000-08:00

I'm never one to toot my own horn, but I can cook... a mean KD. I have excellent toasting abilities with assorted "toastable bread things". And, boiling "noodle things" to a somewhat pasty consistency is essentially second nature to me. In a fix, I'm pretty good with the old microwave. Reheating leftovers is a "done deal". And on occasion, I have melted cheese things with bean, egg, ham, or mixed tuna things on said toastables, and as many as one other person can attest to said cookery as being "edible, but not quite right". So basically, I am a chef-savant.

I pulled this fancy cookery out of the family vaults just for you. I call it: Ants on a Log.

Lisa's Weekly Guitar Chords

2007-01-28T14:54:00.000-08:00

I'll admit it, I can't get enough of the new JT album "FutureSex/LoveSounds". And, until last night, I never thought I could channel my ardour for the mellifluous voice of the newly eligible POPthrob into something other than a spirited interpretive dance. You'll never see those moves on YouTube. But last night that all changed. For it was on this special night that I picked up my sweet sweet Larravee guitar and jammed with Ry and his super phat Fender bass to the Justin groove "What Goes Around".

How was this possible? One simple chord progression (Am, C, G, D). Great news! And as a bonus: You can use this very same chord progression to play Jewel's "Save your Soul" if you so choose. 2 for 1. That's a super deal!

Without further ado, I present to you my weekly guitarmageddon:

"What Goes Around.../...Comes Around Interlude" by Justin Timberlake
Verse, Pre-chorus & Chorus: 4/4 ||: Am - C - | G - D - :||

If you can't read music, all this means is strum each chord for two beats each then repeat over and over until you get to the outro.

For example:

Am
Hey girl,
C G D
Is he everything you wanted in a man?
Am
You know I gave you the world
C G D
You had me in the palm of your hand
Am
So why your love went away?
C G D
I just can't seem to understand
Am
Thought it was me and you, baby
C G
Me and you until the end
D
But I guess I was wrong

Prechorus:
Am
Don't wanna think about it
C
Don't wanna talk about it
G
I'm just so sick about it
D Am
I can't believe it's ending this way
Just so confused about it
C
Feeling the blues about it
G
I just can't do without ya
D Am
Tell me is this fate

Chorus:
C G
Is the way it's really going down?
D Am
Is this how we say goodbye?
C G
Shoulda known better when you came around
D Am
That you were gonna make me cry
C G
It's breaking my heart to watch you run around
D Am
Cause I know that you're living a lie
C G
But that's ok, baby, cause in time you will find

What goes around, goes around, goes around
Comes all the way back around x 4

Verse 2:
Now girl,
I remember everything that you claimed
You said that you were moving on now
Maybe I should do the same
The funny thing about that is
I was ready to give you my name
Thought it was me and you baby
And now, it's all just a shame
That I guess I was wrong

Prechorus:
Chorus:
Bridge:
What goes around comes around
What goes around comes around
You should know that x 2

Prechorus:
Chorus:

Interlude: 4/4 ||: Cmaj7 - D7 - | Em7 - - - :||

Cmaj7
You spend your nights alone
D7
And he never comes home
Em7
And everytime you call him, all you get is a busy tone
Cmaj7
I heard you found out
D7
That he's doing to you
Em7
What you did to me
Ain't that the way it goes
Camj7
When you cheated, girl
D7
My heart bleeded, girl
Em7
So it go without saying that should let the feeling hurt
Just a classic case scenario
Tell is always time
Girl, you got what you deserved
And now you want somebody
To cure the lonely nights
You wish you had somebody
That could come and make it right
But girl, I ain't somebody
I'm out of sympathy
See..

What goes around comes back around
I thought I told ya (x many)

Translate Me

2007-01-27T18:57:00.000-08:00

¿Habla usted español?
Parlez-vous le français?
Möchten Sie mich verstehen?
私は非常におかしいです。

I just couldn't call myself a Linguist with an English-only blog. As a lover of language and culture, I felt sad that I couldn't share with everyone. But today the rain clouds of sadness parted, revealing a beautiful sunny day in the form of a lovely little java script.

I am very happy to announce that "they mostly come out at night... mostly" is now available in nine languages. With a simple click of a national flag button (located above the link-up) you will be LIVE in Your Language. Now that I can call myself a Linguist again, I would like to mention that I would never choose to represent languages with national flags. Not very accurate. I guess majority speaks with this one. Sorry to all the minority languages of these countries not represented here.

I would like welcome my friends of the world and apologize now for any inappropriate translation.

Y Mauritchio, lo siento que mi español es tan malo y por favor mandes más mangoes. Gracias.

Project Ecuador

2007-01-26T20:15:00.000-08:00

I wanted to show my support for the boys of Opportunitas Aequa who are heading off to Chimborazo, Ecuador this week to deliver soccer equipment to the impoverished children of this community. They have collected 1347 soccer balls and 854 pairs of cleats and running shoes and raised $12,330. While in Chimborazo they plan on distributing the equipment and building a soccer field for the community.

To learn more about this inspirational story, check out the Project Ecuador blog. They will be documenting their journey with pictures and video, so check back often. You can read about the GiveMeaning send off in Tom's latest post.

You can contribute to Project Ecuador through GiveMeaning. They have almost reached their second goal of $15,000! Let's help them get there!

This story continues to inspire me everyday. Beautiful.

NB. If you are having problems with Safari browsing, you can download Firefox here.

4th and Vine

2007-01-25T19:51:00.000-08:00

From my Alleyway

2007-01-24T23:34:00.000-08:00

Didn’t you get the memo?

2007-01-23T21:39:00.000-08:00

Canadian actors are on strike. And as a Canadian actor (view shameless and unnecesary inclusion of headshot below) I feel it necessary to say, "I’m so sorry to bother you guys with this strike. But… you see… well… we don't get paid as much as American actors, and well, I don't mean to intrude, but my gym membership went up this month and I’ve taken 3 more shifts a week at the Cactus Club just to pay for my yoga classes, lulus, morning fair-trade lattes, and weekly supply of organic vegetables. I’m really trying hard and doing my best, but because I am a struggling artist/singer/model I just need a little extra cash flow to pay my rent. Sorry. I’m such a nuisance."

As we enter the second week in the first ACTRA strike in history, let us all pause and reflect on the key issues:

Issue #1: Money. We, the underpaid and underappreciated actors of Canada, want more money. You see, SAG actors get paid up to 30% more that we do, even when they are on Canadian soil. That just doesn’t seem right, does it?

Issue #2: Digital Media Exploitation. We hate that our work is used and exploited on the internet. But, if we are to be exploited please pay us. See key issue 1#.

I like money and since UBCP, the union of BC performers, is somehow unaffected by the national strike, I say, “Workers Unite” and all that rah rah Red stuff. And, in support of my thespian brothers and sisters, I will wear my cute Che Guevara tank top to all my auditions this week.

That brings me to today’s audition. The gender-biased tire commercial audition. As it turns out, females don’t play a large role in tire commercials. Basically, the female character named “SOC-wife”, described as “sweet, attractive and attentive”, stands in the door of her suburban bungalow smiling sweetly while her husband delivers a passionate monologue about buying tires for all of his big boy toys, namely his “’vette” and his “golf cart”.

Because I wasn’t able to speak, I had to come up with a strong internal monologue to truly grasp this dynamic character. “Aww shucks Jimmy, not another tire! Why, we’ve got so many tires, I simply don’t know what I’m gonna do with them. Why we’ve even got tires in the living room! You’ve just gone hog wild over those tires. Oh well, boys will be boys. Why don’t I bake you up a nice apple pie for desert?”

Talkin' about the Gravy

2007-01-23T01:20:00.000-08:00

It's clear from the above very tasteful video that Billy really likes him some gravy. And who can blame him? There are times when I really believe in the power of gravy. Gravy is heart and soul of all good turkey dinners. Gravy brings together the rich melting pot of flavours at the Thanksgiving and Christmas table. Gravy doesn't discriminate against white meat or dark. It wraps all colours of meat in a warm embrace. Racial. So...

I think it's safe to say that I also like gravy. But a whole bowl? I think that might be verging on unsafe. And it makes me wonder, "is "Stu" merely a humorous caricature of someone obsessed with gravy, or is "Stu" actually a manifestation of the creator's gravy obsession?" After pondering this for some time, I started to gather some evidence from Billy's formative years, when I believe the obsession began.

Exhibit A (1996): Looking for love in all the wrong places.

Exhibit B: Billy's obsession with gravy begins to show. Seriously.

Exhibit C: Masking his growing addiction in a new found zest for fashion.

Fast forward 10 years.
Exhibit D (2007): Gravy Fever:

One wonders how far this addiction will go. Lest we not forget of our dear French-Canadian friend Sebastien Lemarcroix, who lost his job and family after growing morbidly obese from his addiction to poutine. Je me souviens.

Canadian ice dancers are so hot right now

2007-01-21T17:10:00.000-08:00

Presenting the 2007 Canadian Champions:
Jeffery Buttle
Joannie Rochette
Jessica Dubé and Bryce Davison
Marie-France Dubreuil and Patrice Lauzon

Check out Skate Canada for a detailed list of results.

To watch some of the gold medal performances from Nationals, click on these links Jeffery Buttle FS, Joannie Rochette SP, Dubé/Davison FS Dubreuil/Lauzon OD.

I have to say that I'm loving all the new young dancers in the top 5: Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir, Kaitlyn Weaver and Andrew Poje, Lauren Senft and Leif Gislason. Very exciting! Ice dance is alive and well in Canada. Kudos to the new judging system actually allowing movement in the standings. I remember when the top 10 spots were safe-guarded by the Russian mafia. Back then, you were more likely to see hell freeze over than see movement in the ice dance rankings. Except that one time in 1997, when there was a 5/4 judging panel split in favour of the Azerbaijani team's romantic Arabian-themed free dance over the Lativian team's fast-pasted 1930s swing-themed free dance. They placed 20th and 21st respectively. It was tense.

Canadians photo momento of yours truly during my passionate "Far and Away" Irish folk-themed free dance.

Photo of the Bradshaw dance crew at Thornill, home-base of the Canadian Ice Dance Academy, Toronto. Great memories!

And a magical behind-the-scenes Canadians moment that speaks for itself and the zaniness of Jon Lane.

My First Figure Skating Carnival

2007-01-20T14:27:00.000-08:00

Age: 7
Location: Saskatoon Figure Skating Club
Theme: Jungle Animals
Music: "When the Lion Sleeps Tonight"
Costume: Sequined Lion made by my Mum, the talented seamstress.

Best Chloe Moment: The Taser

2007-01-19T23:51:00.000-08:00

Where can I get my own personal non-lethal weapon of the future? At Taser.com of course. You're on your own for free bandwidth.

McDinner

2007-01-19T13:09:00.000-08:00

It has been over five years since any McEngineered food has passed through these lips. Yesterday, that all changed. At 11pm, Ry comes home from returning this week's DVD selections and says, "I did something bad". My first reaction was that he snuck out and purchased more DVDs, music gear, or consumer electronics. But it was worse.

It was McDinner. Or more like McMidnight Snack. I protested at first, but the bright blue and white box that said "i'm lovin' it" in seven languages, including French, Spanish, German, Russian, Mandarin, and Arabic, made me feel like eating this Filet O'Fish and baked apple pie was important. Finally, I felt connected to the world.

McGlobalism. It just makes you feel special.

Lisa's Weekly Guitar Chords

2007-01-18T02:07:00.000-08:00

I have a very special edition of Lisa's Weekly Guitarmagedon. I present to you two brilliant songs by the Philosopher-Poet extraordinaire, David Brent: "Spaceman" and "Freelove Freeway". The dramatic interlude is also included. Sweet.

"Spaceman"

4/4 ||: Dadd9 - Cmajadd9 - | Gadd6/B - Cadd9 - :||

Spaceman came down to answer some things,
The world gathered round from paupers to kings,
I’ll answer your questions,
I’ll answer them true,
I’ll show the way you know what to do,
Who is wrong and who is right?
Yellow, brown, black or white?
The spaceman he answered “You’ll no longer mind,
I’ve opened your eyes, you’re now colour blind".

"Interlude"

|| C - G - || Am - - - ||

She's the serpent who guards the gates of Hell...

"Freelove Freeway"

4/4 ||: C - F - | Am - G - :||

Verse 1:
Pretty girl on the hood of a cadillac, yeah
She's broken down on Freeway 9.
I take a look, I get her engine started, and
leave her purring and I roll on by. Bye, bye

Chorus:
Free love on the freelove freeway, the
Love is free and the freeway's long, I got some
Hot love on the hot love highway, ain't
Going home 'cause my baby's gone (she's gone)

Verse 2:
A long time later I see a cowboy crying
"Hey buddy, what can I do?"
He says, "I lived a good life, had about a thousand women,"
I said, "Why the tears?", he says, " ' Cause none of them was you".

Chorus x 2
She’s gone yeah, my baby’s gone, she’s gone yeah, gone away,
She’s gone…………yeah

The Ultimate Experience: Play along with David Brent. NB. Ricky's guitar is tuned down a half step.

© Words and Music by Ricky Gervais

Bonus: Watch David Brent "fuse flashdance with MC Hammer shit" in the Office Dance Off.

Skating Hall of Fame: Ryan Smith

2007-01-17T16:51:00.000-08:00

Speed. Edges. Grace. He has it all. Ryan Smith, born in the small Ontario town of Orillia, can twizzle the pants off anyone. Ryan has stood on many ice dance podiums all over the world. I met the superstar skater Ryan Smith in the Calgary airport on the way home from the 2000 Nationals in Calgary. Officially meeting Ryan Smith was a magical moment for me as I had admired his skating prowess for some time.

Let's set the scene shall we:
Event: Official meeting with Ryan Smith, uber ice dancer
Time: 6am on the day after the Closing Gala
Location of uber star: Lying, half on, half off a big pile luggage on the floor of the Calgary airport. NB. Skates are not comfortable to lie on. That'll leave a mark.
I said: "Can I get you some water?"
Result: Friends Forever

Lesson Learned: Pouring your heart and soul into four thrilling performances (+ gala) can sure make you tired. It must be, as Ryan was so exhausted that he had to be dragged from the small dirty patch of airport linoleum which he fell asleep on to make the flight home.

No one captures the beauty and power of latin rhythms on ice better than Ryan Smith (Pictured here with the lovely Brenda Key).

Dazzle me

2007-01-16T21:38:00.000-08:00

Figure Skating: A magnificent, opulent, tremendous, stupendous, gargantuan, bedazzlement. A sensual ravishment.

The 2007 BMO Canadian Figure Skating Championships start today with the Senior Men's and Women's Qualifying round. Results are posted as they happen on the Skate Canada Website The Junior Dance Compulsory (Silver Samba) also began today. Lovely dance that Silver Samba. Thanks to the Fantastic Greg Ladret for teaching me. I think I still owe you a dance...

I always look forward to Senior Dance, sure to be thrilling this year with a spot open on the medal podium. Compulsories start on Thursday. Drawn dance: The Golden Waltz. Tricky. I want to send out special shout out to Senior Dancers Colleen and Adam Drybrough coached by the ice dance legend and co-creator of the Midnight Blues, Mark Bradshaw (The glory of Mark (with Christine Fuller) pictured below. Hot).

More figure skating posts, pictures, nostalgia, and magic moments to follow. It will be: Spectacular Spectacular.

url a nerd update

2007-01-16T03:44:00.000-08:00

Problem solving with Minima:
got the banner up. nice.
resized the columns to match banner. nice.
falling asleep. nicer

better luck tomorrow

}.#url a bigg loser.#{

2007-01-15T18:57:00.000-08:00

As it turns out... editing html code within Blogger templates is not so easy. In fact, it's nearly impossible. At least for me it is. I have a template called Rounders. I felt that the main text column was too narrow and I wanted to extend the column by say 20 pixels, but I wanted to keep the corners round. Well, as it turns out... it is really hard to alter the px size of the "wrapper" in the "rounder" template because they use a .gif file to make the corners rounded and not code that I can alter. Crap.

So I tried the Minima template. Nice and simple. Yes? No. No it wasn't. I really wanted to add a sweet picture banner that I made in Photoshop with the text of my blog name on the photo, but when I added all the code and got my picture up the confounded blogger title wouldn't go away and it looked crappy so... after spending all night cuddled up with html I say "to hell with you blogger templates I'll write my own damned template!" And then I looked into what would be involved in that and...
I reverted back to Rounders.

But be warned, one day soon I will crack this nut wide open and weave it into a dream that matches my inner blogging fire. Get it? Dreamweaver. Nerd.

Until then, I will be narrow and round and you will love me.

And the kill count begins...

2007-01-14T19:10:00.000-08:00

"I don't need another reason to put a bullet in your brain."

My First (and Last) Poetry Class

2007-01-14T01:56:00.000-08:00

When I was 17, fresh out of the loving arms of the Oak trees, I wanted to be a writer. Not just any kind of writer, but a Poet. Writing poems just seemed so meaningful, so connected, so mysterieux… I was either going to apply to the UVic writing program or become a Russian spy (cover: Katya Irina Kalinka the fiercely passionate Olympic ice dancer). Both seemed completely do-able at the time. I had to make up my mind. I quickly constructed a pros and cons list to decide. In the end, Con: “I am not Russian”, tipped the scales in the direction of a writing career. But to keep the dreams alive, a compromise was made: Major in writing, minor in Slavonic Studies, Figure Skating, and Foreign Espionage. University credits towards graduation: 0.0.

In order to apply to the competitive writing program, I had to submit 25 of my most heart-felt poems. Immediately, I thumbed through the pages of my well-loved journal: An embroidery covered book I bought from Chinatown for $2, embellished with glued-in collages of pressed foliage and whimsical travel photos underscored with William Blake quotes: “To see a grain of sand…”

To cut a long story in half, I was accepted into the program. Heidi Klum would say, “Lisa’s poems were IN and obtaining Russian citizenship was OUT”. And so it began…

Writing 100. First term: Poetry. Perfect. Expected grade: A+ Well, I was the best poet in my entire high school English class (and it was Honours), so… yeah… I was basically a poetic prodigy. I wrote my first poem about breaking-up with my boyfriend. Tragic. My pain and tears became words and flowed onto the page. My first poetry assignment was a bedazzlement of structure, rhyme, and metaphors about dying flowers and eagles (and they’re pretty much extinct so… yeah… painful). First grade received: C -. What? In all my life I had never received such a crappy grade ever. Well, to be honest I wasn’t so hot at Maths or Potions. 10 points from Gryffindor.

The “receiving of the crappy grades” continued throughout the term. I just couldn’t get a grip on what my professor wanted. What was I to do? I was failing miserably and I had to get an A+ on the mid-term poem or I would be dishonourably discharged from the writing club. The mid-term poem was the last and only link to discovering where the kidnapping terrorists were hiding Jack Bauer and some sort of large nuclear device. Wait. I digress momentarily.

Back to Poetry 101. The day before mid-terms my teacher singled out “her favourite young writer” to come before the class and present his life-altering poem “Jesus is me”. Set to a subtle pulsing strum of an out of tune guitar, the poem went something like this:

love
carry me?
not.
A wish
found?
lost in me
lost in Jesus
I am He.

Blink. Nod. Yes. It all snapped into focus. That A+ was in my grasp now. So here, for the first time ever, I present my first and only A+ poetry assignment (for sadly, this was to be the last poetry class I ever took):

Trilogy.

jam.

disconnected wooden shelves
filled with red jams
sticky lids
handwritten labels
blackberry, raspberry, strawberry
dated and stacked
“this November”

cake.

they’re half coloured in
like the story of you and i.
half finished.
half loved.
half baked.

when i was little i had an easy bake oven.

tiny round cakes cooked with a lightbulb.
crispy on the outside, soggy in the middle
just like you.

tea.

it's kind of salt.tea
bitter even. how u
realize after the fact.

but here i stay – (with a) silver spoon
beneath the chandelier

step off balance.tw-is-ter.
twisting. sailing the 7 seas.
wd u like a cup of tea?

-- this entry is dedicated to Jessie and her love of broken, stream-of-consciousness poems written on thick handmade paper crafted from bark, flowers, and bits of carrot. Lovely.

My First Music Video

2007-01-13T14:43:00.000-08:00

Let's set the scene, shall we.

Year: Y2K
Location: Far East Queen St., TO
Character: Layer Girl
Wardrobe: All PVC: tube top, mini skirt, knee high boots
Hair: Due to the high humity frizz factor, my hair was straightened every 30 minutes for 12 hours
Make-up: Blue eyeshadow, Lipstick shade: "Not so innocent"
Season: Summer (during the worst heat wave in 20 years)

Magic moments:
1. When the wardrobe girl enhanced my cleavage using duct tape
2. When the other layer girl bent over to put on her boots and split the bottom seam of her pants and looked directly at me and said "Whatchu expect? I ain't no white girl. I got some cuuurves." Snap.
3. Faux buffing and blowing the lead singer's nails
4. When the director ordered the PA to wipe my butt print from the leather stool I was sitting on between each take
5. When I realized I had to take the streetcar, then subway home at 3am with pictured make-up and boots because the zipper on said boots was stuck
6. Cutting PVC boots off with kitchen scissors at 4am

That's Hot.

Jack Bauer: Master of Disguise

2007-01-11T22:26:00.000-08:00

Hat.

Beard.

Gun.

Aviators.

Aviators + cell phone.

What we've learnt:
Hats, beards, guns, aviator sunglasses, and cell phones are all excellent ways of maintaining deep cover.

As Jack Bauer would say: "You probably don't think that I can force this towel down your throat. But trust me, I can."

just a touch of snow

2007-01-11T15:58:00.000-08:00

Missing the Talking Moose

2007-01-10T19:03:00.000-08:00

iNerd nostalgia. Don't we all hold a special place in our hearts for the Macintalk text-to-speech firecracker that was the Talking Moose?

You can now relive Moose Talk (thanks Billy)

First thing the new Moose said to me:
"Stop changing programs and get to work! What is Safari good for anyway?"

iNerd alert: the rundown on Macworld 2007

2007-01-09T18:36:00.000-08:00

iNerd alert. Three word summary: Big bad accessories. Steve Jobs brought a whole bag of goodies to Macworld 2007, including John Mayer (not for sale, yet). While I think that the iPhone is super sweet (touch screen and all), at $600+ and packaged with Cingular (AKA Rogers CAN), it's not really gonna fly with me. How will I ever find my way to lulu in my SUV without GPS? Ditto for the new and improved iPods. Anything that is cooler than my prehistoric pink Mini brings tears to my eyes. What made up for this: Steve burning the Zune. 2% market share. Impressive.

Here are the things that I am hot for:

1. Get n'sync with Apple Tv ($349 CAN) 40 GB HD, HDMI, ethernet, audio, analog, wireless 802.11... all good things. Get hooked up. One better in an ideal world: Syncing with all the Front Row, not just iTunes.

2. Go Go Airport Extreme Base station! ($179 CAN) 802.11n. Faster = Better. Shared HD, Loves it.

Awesome.

But Steve, where is Leopard? and iLife '07? and iWork '07? Oh Steve, it hurts me to run Microsoft Office on my sleek lil' mac laptop. Surely you do not want me to have to use Excel day after day. Get this damnable stylized green "x" out of my dock. Forever. You can shove the "universal" Microsoft Office 2008 where the sun don't shine.

We need a "lock-down" on priorities Steve. Maybe someone is getting a little greedy over market shares at Apple Inc.

Lego giraffe

2007-01-09T13:58:00.000-08:00

For Kelli and her love of Lego. (I'm in Legoland, Disneyland, hence the Princess visor)

Filmmaking 101: Avoid the on-screen cross-over

2007-01-08T19:16:00.000-08:00

The script girl/boy is in charge of continuity. Continuity in film is important because scenes, coverage, and inserts are often shot out of sequence. Keeping track of the continuity of plot, character development, blocking, wardrobe, hair and makeup is indeed chaotic, especially on a big production (on a small 5-day student film, not so much.)

Now keeping in mind the importance of continuity, it is only a small part to making a good film. It needs to be there, understood, but it should remain under the director’s radar. As should the script boy, who is definitely low on the filmmaking food chain. But what happens when the script boy gets an ego? What happens when the director becomes seduced by said script boy and lets the whole scene revolve around continuity?

One such example:
A simple scene really: A car parks on a residential street. A girl and boy get out of a car. The girl and boy see an old friend across the street, and proceed to cross the street. How could you get that wrong? It sounds so simple. Not for the student film crew. Here’s where the difficulty came bubbling to the surface. During blocking, the script boy pointed out that before crossing the street the girl is on the right, the boy on the left, but after crossing the street the girl is on the left and the boy is on the right. Continuity has run amuck.

The Solution:
The dubious “on-screen cross-over”. Somewhere, somehow, the girl (that would be me) has to cross-over the path of the boy to end up on the left side of the boy, thus preserving continuity. All this in one take. Natural.

Here’s how it played out on screen:

Wh- wh-, where am I going? Oh... that way.

Quick distract the audience with the Katie Holmes-hair-behind-the-ear trick.

Ouch.

Lisa's Weekly Chord Chart

2007-01-07T17:18:00.000-08:00

Here's a chord chart I made for a terrific, easy song to learn on this rainy Sunday night. No bar chords. It's a good thing. Something I just learnt: In a slash chord i.e., G/B, the right most chord, in this case "B" represents the base note in the chord. G over B is a G major chord with a B in the bass. To play it, just form a regular G chord shape and dampen or take off the G bass note (your fourth finger on the top string).

"You're Beautiful" by James Blunt

Capo 3rd fret

Verse:
4/4 ||: C - - - | G - - - | Am - - -| F - - - :|| ( x 4)
| C - - - | G - - - | Am - - - | Am - - - ||

Chorus:
||: F - G - | C - - - :|| ( x 2)
| F - G - | C - G/B - | Am - - - | F - G - | Am - - - |
| F - G - | C - - - ||

Verse 2:
||: C - - - | G - - - | Am - - - | F - - - |
| C - - - | G - - - | Am - - - | Am - - - ||

Chorus:

Bridge:
|| F - Am - | F - Am - | F - Am - | D - - - ||

Final Chorus:
||: F - G - | C - - - :|| ( x 2)
||: F - G - | C G/B | Am - - - :||
| Am - - - | F - G - | Am - - - | F - G - | C - - - ||

Lyrics:
My life is brilliant
My life is brilliant
My love is pure
I saw an angel
Of that I'm sure
She smiled at me on the subway
She was with another man
But I won't lose no sleep on that
'Cause I've got a plan

Chorus:
You're beautiful
You're beautiful
You're beautiful, it's true
I saw your face
In a crowded place
And I don't know what to do
'Cause I'll never be with you

Verse 2:
Yes, she caught my eye
As we walked on by
She could see from my face that I was
Fucking high
And I don't think that I'll see her again
But we shared a moment that will last to the end

Chorus:
Bridge:

Final Chorus:
You're beautiful
You're beautiful
You're beautiful, it's true
There must be an angel
With a smile on her face
When she thought up that I should be with you
But it's time to face the truth
I will never be with you

Welcome to my trailer.

2007-01-04T22:32:00.000-08:00

Let's set the scene shall we.
6am call time.
Location: Abbotsford.
Wardrobe: Lingerie + 3" Stilettos
Season: Winter.
Perks: Getting paid and the Movie-set trailer.

Getting a movie-set trailer is a landmark achievement in show biz. It screams, "I have finally made it out of the extras tarp." Out of the cold and up the metal stairs to "Actor status" (AKA Day Player status) including heat, a private bathroom, a plush little bench/bed, and access to non-stop snacking at craft services. And let me tell you. It doesn't come feel anymore glamorous than being in a movie-set trailer.

Day Player Glamour check list:
1. Super sweet sound system so you can bump your junk to the latest crunk.
2. Roomy bathroom (no heat).
3. PA-delivered fruit salad while in hair and makeup for 3 intense hours. Fake Uggs not included.
4. Inspirational views of trailer #14.
5. The Name Decal, a vast improvement from the Descriptor Decal a la Brunette #1 or Party Slut #20.

Wet.

2007-01-04T17:08:00.000-08:00

Now you can help yourself

2007-01-03T17:07:00.000-08:00

Are you confused about life? Is there a large question mark hanging slightly to the left your head? Are you frantically trying to piece the parts of your life together? Do you need to find the easiest way to glue part A and B together? Did you already unknowingly glue part A to D? It happens to the best of us. There is no need to wander around the world looking like a crazed cartoon man.

Call Ikea.

Happy now.

Worst Song Lyrics Challenge

2007-01-02T15:25:00.000-08:00

Bad song lyrics hurt me. They get under my skin and slowly eat away at my music-loving soul. I just can't take it anymore! It's time to expose the horror. It's time for my first blogging challenge: Worst Song Lyrics Ever. I dare you. And no googling. That's cheating.

My three nominations:
1. "Email My Heart" (Britney)

E-mail my heart and say our love will never die
and I know you're out there and I know that you still care.
Email me back and say our love will stay alive
Forever, Email my heart

2. "Whereever, Whenever" (Shakira)

Lucky that my lips not only mumble
They spill kisses like a fountain
Lucky that my breasts are small and humble
So you don't confuse them with mountains

3. " Siberia" (Backstreet Boys)

When my heart did time in Siberia
Was waiting for the lie to come true
'Cause it's all so dark and mysterious
When the one you want doesn't want you too

Rhyming "Siberia" with "mysterious" is never a good idea.

things I learnt this year

2006-12-31T15:48:00.000-08:00

And now I shall reflect on some of the things I learnt from the year that was 2006:

1. Global warming seems to be a bit of an "issue". According to Dennis Quaid, an important US climatologist, the worst is yet to come. Watch out for those super-cells, they are especially nasty. So let's all recycle. Good.

2. Terrorists are never Americans. It's really that simple.

3. Jack Bauer would make a great president. Everything squared up in 24 hours. When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer hates lemonade. Yah, that's right. Most pilots need 5,000 feet of runway to land a plane. Jack Bauer needs 100 feet and a gun. Jack Bauer doesn't speak any foreign languages, but he can make any foreigner speak English in a matter of minutes.

4. Pluto: Still a cartoon dog, but not a planet. After failing to comply with Celestial Body Classification #3 the object has cleared the neighborhood around its orbit, Pluto was demoted to "dwarf planet" status. Crap. Now what am I gonna do with my grade 7 science project?

5. We are only as sick as the alien inside us. Quick grab your e-meter and release your inner thetan! Besides being a super way to meet A-listers, "Scientology is the only specific cure for radiation burns." Wow. Impressive. What else L. Ron? "Arthritis vanishes, myopia gets better, heart illness decreases, asthma disappears, stomachs function properly and the whole catalogue of illnesses goes away and stays away." I know my stomachs are already feeling better just listening to your words. Healing power. Praise Xenu!

5. We should all thank youtube for finding a useful medium for glitchy 5-year old web cameras and their pasty teenage basement-dwelling owners.

6. Mac or PC? Microsoft answers the age-old debate with the Zune. Nice One. Really.

Happy 2007!

things I find unsettling about ‘in-between’ BC ferries

2006-12-29T23:17:00.000-08:00

The holiday season is a busy time for ferry traffic. That’s why the good folks at BC Ferries have upped the number of ferries “in play” between Swartz Bay and Tsawwassen. You know what that means. The addition of the oh-so-popular “in-between” ferries! After missing the 5 o'clock ferry, we were lucky enough to catch the 6 o'clock holiday “in between-er” ferry, the Queen of Vancouver. This deluxe edition ferry, built in 1962, has a super sweet arcade featuring at least 4 games (tons of fun), a sun deck (lovely in December), a bevy of tourism brochures (useful), and a roomy White Spot slop-n-drop restaurant sandwiched between rust and dirt (nice). Although it was quite a delightful ride across the Straight, I must say that I found a few things quite unsettling. Here are some pictures I captured to unsettle you:

Happy Holidays

2006-12-24T15:39:00.000-08:00

The Spirit of Christmas

2006-12-22T10:18:00.000-08:00

Nothing gets you more in the spirit of Christmas than a trip on the Tsawassen-Swartz Bay Ferry. I can hardly wait to dig into my White Spot pirate pack. I look forward to seeing everyone in Victoria.

Graduation Day

2006-12-21T22:25:00.000-08:00

A big congratulations to my mum on her retirement day. I think 40+ years is long enough. Good! Now you have time for the good stuff: Relaxing, traveling, and cleaning your bird bath. Remember, there are doors opening everywhere. I think Dr. Phil said that.

Congratulations to Ry on his UBC MMSI graduation day. We'll have to find room on the walls to put up another certificate of achievement.
Not on my walls though.
Find your own.

Zissou approved activity

2006-12-20T12:48:00.000-08:00

Cuba: A remote and fascinating region teeming with extraordinary marine life. We chose the mysterious waters just in front of our resort, mainly due to the relative convenience of it. This was our most ambitious adventure to date.

BC Transit Bus Girl

2006-12-18T23:22:00.000-08:00

Before I become an international celebrity for my stellar interpretation of ancient blood lust, I think it's appropriate to take a look back at my humble beginnings in the spotlight.

At the tender age of 22, I was plucked out of my life as an ordinary UVIC student and thrust into the limelight of fame that is the "BC Transit Bus Girl".

I won't lie to you and say that the transition to a province-wide transportation celebrity was easy. I was no longer a face in a sea of disgruntled left-wing students. I was now a recognizable face, a bus legend in the making. Immediately, my new celebrity 'status' changed my simple ways. I was constantly cornered in the university hallways and hassled for autographs.

"Hey! Aren't you the girl... (looks at bus guide).. on the bus guide? Oh yah!! (holds guide up to my face) Yah, that's definitely you! (pause) Did you know you were on the bus guide? Ha ha"

All this newly found fame and fortune took its toll on me. Taking the bus to school everyday became a painful experience. Oh the shame I felt when I stood at the bus stop waiting for the No. 4. I could feel the piercing stares of the passengers as I walked the long squeaky path to the end of the bus where I could shield my face from their mockery. I took to wearing a lot of large sunglasses and sun hats that year. 'Blending' was my key objective.

But how was I to blend or be at peace in my inner temple when people considered me the "Ambassador of BC Transit".

"Hey Bus Girl! When does the Number 14 arrive?"
"What bus do I take to get to Tillicum Mall?"
"공항에게 나를 데려가십시요?"

I don’t know. I don’t work for BC transit. I’m just a student here like you. I don’t speak Chinese. The problems didn’t stop there. I was also blamed for inconsistencies in transportation scheduling and fare increases.

"Hey Bus Girl! Why is the bus always late?"
"This bus smells funny"
“$1.75! Doesn’t the government have enough of my money! And you expect me to pay 25cents to look at your stupid face” (Me: “The bus guide is free”) “Whatever.”

The worst was when the buses went on strike and people threw food in my hair.

Commenting enabled

2006-12-18T23:03:00.000-08:00

For those of you unable to post comments due to your non-blogger status, I am sorry. I sure 'googled' it up. Everything is 'squared-up' and ready to go. Post away!

Super Villians

2006-12-17T20:14:00.000-08:00

While preparing for the role of soul-sucking Akiimu the Great, I have found myself contemplating the thick murky soup of evil. Evil ‘Super’ Villains like Dark Lords, Vampires, Demons, and the author of the Da Vinci Code. What makes you tick Evil thing? Were you turned over to the dark side or did you choose it?

And so I ask you to help me solve this most pertinent question:

Who is the most Evil?

Lord Voldemort
Professor Snape
the “Others”
Sauron
bad aliens (in general)
bad machines (like PCs or terminators, in general)
Cylons
Darth Vader
Gargamel
Skeletor
Lex Luthor
Akasha
Wolfram and Heart
Angelus
the Mayor
the “First”
Tony Soprano
Arvin Sloan
Sherry Palmer
Rasputin
Teri Hatcher
__________ (insert evil villain here)

Acting in Vancouver

2006-12-16T00:35:00.000-08:00

For Monday’s audition I must transform myself into a girl who has had her soul displaced by "Akiimu", an ancient Babylonian spirit who wreaks havoc and murder wherever she goes. Apparently, ol' Akiimu likes to hang out at sweet bars, make out with biker dudes, and dance to cheesy power ballads. There really is no accounting for taste.

Glitter is gold

2006-12-14T21:37:00.000-08:00

I admit it. I love Christmas. I just can't get enough shiny, sparkly, glittery things. I think I'm withdrawing from my figure skating days. -- on my dress, in my hair, on my eye lashes, on my finger nails... glitter, sequins, rhinestones, crystals... more, more, more! Make me shine like the star that I am!

And who doesn't love sequins? I'll tell you who doesn't. The girl who skates after you in the wake of your sequin parade. There is nothing more spectacular (I mean horrifying) than your main competition stumbling over your left-over sparkles. Oh no! Oooh! Ouch. Poor thing. I hope that fall won't effect her over-all standings. Off the medal podium? Aww, what a shame!

The Sequin Splat. If it doesn't happen to you, it's a good thing.

A year and a bit in review (part two)

2006-12-14T15:24:00.000-08:00

Spring Trip 2006 to Varadero, Cuba.

Sally-ann's bird watching

2006-12-13T14:42:00.000-08:00

I interrupt this stunning montage for another fabulous 'glogger', Sally-ann. I think we can all learn something "precious" from Sally-ann.

A year and a bit in review (part one)

2006-12-13T00:29:00.000-08:00

August 2005: Ry and I moved to Vancouver. Here are some pictures of our apartment in Coal Harbour right by Stanley Park.

The 'Magic' of Student Films

2006-12-10T16:36:00.000-08:00

This summer, at the urging of my agent for more on-set experience, I auditioned for the lead in a student film. After two call-backs, I was cast as "Clara" a quirky, yet loving waitress who comes between two men. Original? Absolutely. I was feeling uninspired going into the project, but the director seemed focused on setting the bar high. He cited Krzysztof Kieslowski's "Blue" and Michel Gondry's "Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind" as inspirations for this film. Sounds good? Sure does. And it was, until I found out that we were shooting the majority of the "bar scenes" at a derelique strip club. Oh yes.

Nevertheless, I trucked on and showed up at 6am each day for the duration of the 5-day shoot. I cannot express the wealth of knowledge I accumulated from being a part of such a well-run movie making machine. I will not even try to explain my personal transformation. Perhaps I could quote an old Mariah Carey song instead… “spread your wings and prepare to fly, for you have become a butterfly, oh fly...” Oh sorry, that’s a bit too much. What I will do instead, is let you in on some of the magical movie moments which transpired. You see, in an effort to preserve the 'magic', I transcribed (word for word) some of the on-set conversations I witnessed. And now, because of the miracle of the blog, the magic shall pass to you.
_______________________
Day One:

Fat ‘actor’ guy: You know what would suck… (pause - deep in thought) you’re walking on the beach and you find a HUGE chest of gold

Surfer ‘prop’ guy: Yah, totally.

Fat guy: I mean how would you carry it? Gold is SUPER heavy –

Surfer guy: Yah, totally, like a bar of gold is so errrg (makes a zombie motion with arms).

Fat guy: -- yah just like a camera case full of it would, like, wrench my arm. I think I’d just find a way, I dunno, (pause) I’d find a way (pause) to like strap it to myself—

Surfer guy: Huh huh, yah, like stuff it in my clothes until I couldn’t fit any more – I’d be like whoa whoa (motions with arms)

Fat guy: I wonder what a good cover story would be (dead serious)

Surfer guy: Yeah, I dunno (pause). You could say it was fake gold, like for a movie or something, or maybe pretend you’re working on a movie –

Fat guy: -- yeah that’s a plan (hand motion “guns”) but wouldn’t they notice that you had all this gold strapped to your body

Surfer guy: Oh yeah… (pause). Sucks.
____________________________________
Day Two:

Boom girl: I’m so sleepy I could just…. ahh the sun is so nice… nice.. sleepy.. oh! I totally had to most weirdest creepiest dream. It was you, me, Jessie, Sam, Susan, Carrie, and Dave and we were all in a closet, but because we were fighting a war, you know, with the outside world, or something, we couldn’t get out and Dave was super pale, like dying or something, and you were off somewhere --

Surfer guy: Oh cool!

Fat guy: That’s so freaky.

Boom girl: -- and then you and me had to babysit for these kids, like twenty of them and most of them were Siamese twins –

Surfer guy: Weird!!

Boom girl: I know!!

Fat guy: That’s SO freaky

Boom girl: --and dave was so pale, I was sure he was dead or something --

Surfer guy: A ZOMBIE… errrgg… (mimics a zombie)

Boom girl: -- so then we –

Surfer guy: I can, like control my dreams. It’s almost like I’m awake. But I heard somewhere that even if you can control you’re dreams you shouldn’t, cuz it’s like bad for you (pause) your health.

Boom girl: -- oh totally, so the Siamese twins had a really big head … uh heads –

Surfer guy: -- when I was 15, I use to sit in school with my eyes WIDE open, like this (pulls open his squinty eyes) but I’d be dreaming about all kinds of things.
____________________________________
Day Three:

The crew, bored with making the movie on this hot, summer day, has started a “hacky sack” game. Only their hacky sack is a ball made out of electrical tape and their hacky sacking is actually just throwing the ball to each other. They seem amused by this. This scene takes us to the first throw of this thrilling game.

Surfer guy: HORSE! (throws tape at boom girl – still holding boom)

Boom girl: what?

Surfer guy: oh sorry, I’m from the States.

Boom girl: oh yeah. Here we call it “SHUCK”.
____________________________________
Day Four:

The AD is the hugest dork I have ever seen. Stringy hair tied back in a haphazard ponytail with a full ugly patchy beard. Here’s the clincher, he’s wearing a Walmart special Superman shirt. It is so big and ill-fitted. His skinny, clammy body just hangs inside it like a hammock. Besides being the first AD (read: PA) he is also the “On-set Safety Supervisor”. Each day before shooting, he takes a moment to review some important on-set safety issues.

Superman: Hey, Hi! Hey! (awkward silence). So now that we’ve got everyone here, actors, extras and crew (pause) well we are still waiting on a few anyway (frustrated pause). Before we begin today I’d like to go through some important safety notices which are really important when we’re all on set like this. First, does everyone have a water bottle? (holds up Exhibit A water bottle) Well, everyone should get one from –

Craft service girl: -- Hey, hey! (waves arms to grab attention) We have NO water bottles left. NONE (yelling) Yesterday (glare) those of you who were on set (glare) (20+ people in 30 degree heat for 9 hours) took all the bottles we had for the entire shoot (12 small bottles). I am very disappointed in you. So now you’ll all have to use paper cups and drink tap water, because that’s what you get!

Superman: (nervous laugh) Ahem, well dehydration is an issue, so maybe those of you without a water bottle should make a trip to the corner store.

Surfer guy: Yah there’s a Starbucks, so you can get some coffee

Boom girl: Oh yeah, I love coffee. Weeee! Caffine! Caffine! (she can’t really control the volume of her voice)

Superman: Bad idea! (shut down) (pause) (nervous giggle) Coffee is REALLY bad for dehydration, I mean coffee is about the opposite of water.
____________________________________
Day Five:

I’ve just walked into the derelique strip club we are filming in. It’s early and I’m tired. I walk in and put my bag down. Suddenly I notice a small Asian girl with very large glasses, dressed in baggy white sweatpant suit with brand new tennis shoes, standing right in front of me.

Extra girl: Hi!

Me: Hey (avoid avoid)

Extra girl: Hi, I’m Sonny. I’m in Class 101 (reaches forward to shake my hand)

Me: Hey. (avoid eye contact)

Extra girl: Who are you?

Me: I’m Lisa – I’m playing Clara in the production.

Extra girl: I’m just Sonny. (dead serious)

Vanity of the Blog

2006-12-09T20:04:00.000-08:00

I said I wouldn't do it... the vanity of the blog -- the personal photo montage. Oh, the very words sting my precious modesty. But people keep asking me for "photos" and what can I do? I am nothing if not extremely giving to my fan(s). So I will put up some photos, but there will be no montage of any kind. Here are some screen caps from my first official acting gig on CTV's "Whistler" where I played the part of a strong, independent woman looking for love and redemption (either that or a hooker).

In a matter of days

2006-12-07T22:43:00.000-08:00

Self-discovery through personal labels

2006-12-06T22:26:00.000-08:00

Coming up with a label is an important step in your personal self-discovery.

Throughout my young life, I have struggled with personal labels. In high school I was smart and I played the flute in band. People liked the labels “nerd” or “geek”, I liked the label “gifted”. In my university years, family members and government organizations used the “student” label a lot. And I liked that since I got free money, medical coverage, and loving support. The “student” label did all the things a good label should do. It was very general and made people think that I was doing something meaningful with my life. And what is more meaningful than Russian cinema? Absolutely nothing.

The downside to the “student” label is that it has an approximate shelf-life of about 4 years or about $20,000. After that, no one will be impressed with that label. At this point, you may want to slap on another descriptor label like “grad” to your “student” label. “Grad student”. Has a nice ring to it doesn’t it? It certainly does. “Grad student” will extend your “student” shelf-life another two years, but be careful where you use it. In the company of grown-up working folks with “real” jobs, “real world” experience, and “real” problems, the “grad student” label may incur a whole lot of nasty questions. If you’re like me, you probably want to avoid those zingers. Ouch. The best way to deal with the working proletariat is to put them in their place. Try the superior labels such as, “scholar” or “academic” in the same sentence as “saving the world” or “bettering our society” and watch the zing deflect. How do like that? That’s what I thought.

After you are finished “saving the world” for a few more years you may feel a great loss as you say good-bye to the “student” label. If you are like me, you may have totally burnt out from writing your thesis in a month and come to the painful realization that your contribution in the betterment of the world will probably end up in the recycling bin (which is better than the garbage because at least you are saving trees and trees help us breathe = saving the world. So it all works out. Right?)

Concluding thoughts: Before you embark on a new chapter in your life it is important to redefine yourself.
You are your label and when you lose your label you are nothing but an individual. And that idea sickens me.

Coming soon: 5 easy steps to make your own label

Mindy's Self-Actualization

2006-12-05T00:56:00.000-08:00

My blog is becoming so popular (kudos to me) that I have people literally begging to be a guest blogger. My first 'glogger' is my bff Mindy. Mindy is a totally wicked girl that I bonded with at my hot sweat yoga class in Kits ("girl, i feel the heat!"). We became fast friends over some really crazy “single and fabulous” girls’ nights at the Milestones (“I think I’ve had one too many cosmos!! LOL) Anyway, you get the picture.

Mindy is a super successful fashion consultant who is currently designing her own organic hemp fashion line for dogs called Pampered Poochies (sooo cute). She is an expert on self-actualization and Oprah. Basically, she’s my own personal Dr. Phil (love him). With that said, I present my blog’s first glogger Mindy:

Hey blog world it’s Mindy!

I’m so excited to be on a blog. Yay!! Thanks for having me! The reason I wanted to be a part of this blog is because I really wanted to get my voice out and share some of my experiences with everyone this holiday season. I know the holidays can be hard for people, even a super successful fashion consultant/designer (yes, it’s true!) Reflecting on the year that has passed is full of humility and reflection. When I reflect on my last year I think, “phew, you made it girl” and “I can’t believe that happened to me” and “wow, that’s great”. Those are just some of the things that come to mind. When I have my yearly “reflection” I always write a list of resolutions to help me become a better person. I want to share my resolutions with you in the hopes that they will inspire you to become a better person.

Mindy’s 2007 Resolutions

1. Recycle more
2. Build indoor micro-organic sunflower farm and make sunflower oil
3. Stop drinking so many lattes
4. Stop drinking so many martinis
5. Go to gym more
6. Lose 10 pounds
7. Find the perfect guy (I know he’s out there!!)
8. Buy sexy underwear
9. Wax bikini line every two weeks
10. Read Cosmo’s sex tips
11. Start going to Cactus Club after work
12. Read "He's just not that into you" AGAIN
13. Get married!! (You're almost 30!!)
14. Read all of Oprah’s Book Club books
15. Start going to yoga EVERYDAY
16. Buy new lululemon yoga outfit (pink or baby blue)
17. Self-actualize!
18. Spend more time with the girls
19. Spend more time running, instead of eating
20. I like pink things

label me

2006-11-30T01:11:00.000-08:00

Personal labels are important. They tell people who you are, what you do, your passions, and your internal dialogue. Labels allow people sum up your entire personality and worth in a few simple words. Labels aid in the categorization of individuals into basic social groups. And social groups connect you to the world, like internet sharing.

Take this for an example: One day you’re a disconnected nobody weighed down by all your freakish individualisms and the next day you’re piggy-backing off of your neighbour’s really fast internet connection uploading the last five seasons of “24” like a hot damn. Now you’ve got it. Yes, sharing and labels go hand in hand. Like uploading movies and criminals.

Labels are belonging. And who doesn’t want to belong?
I know I do.

Concluding thoughts: Labels save people the valuable time and effort in getting to know you. And time is money. And money is important. And so I circumvent back to the beginning “labels are important”.

Coming soon: Self-discovery through personal labels